If you’ve lived in Ghana for a
while, chances are that you’ve had to pay bribe at one point to get something
done. Bribes are an unavoidable part of the Ghanaian society. Without them,
nothing moves. One popular Ghanaian politician said corruption can not be
totally eradicated from society.
There are certain etiquette one
has to observe in paying bribes. No self respecting Ghanaian will accept bribes
“just like that”. The giver needs to learn the right way to give it. I’ve
attempted to document the rules that govern the giving of bribes.
LANGUAGE:
The giving of bribe inspires some
of the most beautiful parables and proverbs you can find around. For example
when giving a bribe, you don’t say, “Please take this Gh¢300 as bribe”. That’s
just unacceptable. You have to say, “Please take this Gh¢300 to buy some pure
water”. Never mind that pure water cost a mere 10p. This way the receiver can
take the bribe with a clear conscience.
You also need to be wise enough
to understand when someone is asking for bribe. Some time ago I had to get a
Security clearance from the Police. I was told that it took two weeks for the
report to be done or 3days for express. I paid for express and
returned on the forth day. When I got there the report had not yet been done.
According to the officer, there were so many papers on his table and his Binatone
Standing fan kept blowing them away. He said he wanted a stone to put on my
application so that mine didn’t get blown away. So I got him an expensive stone
and right in front of me he filled the form and I was on my way.
PRESENTATION
You shall under no circumstance
give bribe in a brown envelope. Brown envelopes in Ghana are synonymous with bribes so
at all cost, avoid them. You can put the money in a white envelope or present
it unwrapped. Bribes may not be presented as cheque or money order. If it has
to be money, it should always be cold hard cash.
It is not bribe if it is not
money. You may present your bribe in the form of hampers especially during
festivities. Hampers have become a part of the Ghanaian society. You can even
present a hamper in public without anyone frowning on it.
At the beginning of the High
School academic year it is normal to see parents visiting the residence of
headmasters with fattened goats. These goats are the means by which student who
didn’t qualify ride into various schools. No one can accuse the headmaster of
taking bribe; all he took was a goat.
Always remember, "it is not bribe if it is not money" 😂😂😂 #233moments pic.twitter.com/GBuY5znGcr
— Efo Dela (@Amegaxi) October 12, 2013
You may also present what ever
money or gift you have to the person’s children. For example you can offer to
pay his kids school fees for one term or buy a very expensive gift for his kids
on their birthday or Christmas. No one can say that is a bribe, obviously the
kids are not the same as their parents.
CONCLUSION
If for any reason someone is bold
enough to ask you directly for bribe, you are not allowed to bargain. Just pay
up.
Always remember, if you don’t pay
it won’t get done. Just accept that and don’t give anyone a lecture on morality
or patriotism.