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Friday, 14 February 2014

The Value is a Shame

I don't really understand all what these experts talk about when discussing the economy. All I know is that at the beginning of 2013, Fan Yogo (Ice cream) was 50p and by the end of 2013 it was GhȻ1.00. The price of everything went up by at least 100% and yet at the end of the year, smug faced politicians were all over the radio and TV telling us how good the economy was.



I knew there was going to be trouble in 2007 when the cedi was re-denominated. The problem is that Ghanaians hate any form of mathematics that isn't a simple multiplication or division by the number 10. Decimals just freak us out! The conversion from the old currency to new was;

(Old cedi)/10000 = new cedi

The first problem with this was the Ȼ50 and Ȼ20 coins disappeared and the Ȼ100 coin became the 1p which was the smallest denomination. The 1p was discriminated against right from the beginning. It created the uncomfortable problem of having prices like GhȻ2.7 something, as I said, Ghanaian absolutely loathe. People immediately started rounding prices to the nearest multiple of 10. Even the 5p coin was discriminated against. Prices started jumping ridiculously no thanks to this. Back then, the cedi the value of the cedi to the dollar ($1) was  around Ȼ10,000 (GhȻ1.00).

I remember then President Kufuor on TV smiling and making a rather dry joke about how the cedi was now equal to the dollar. Yeah, right, all we had to do was drop four significant zeros.


I used to be able to feel good about myself when I gave Ȼ5000 collection at church or when an Uncle gave me Ȼ10,000.00. Now Ȼ5000 is 50p and even beggars ask for GhȻ1.00 (which used to be Ȼ10,000) with straight faces. 50p is what you pay for the shortest distance by public transport. I'm not even that old and I am already missing the 'Good Old Days'.

Right now, the 1p coin is a critically endangered species that is not legal tender anywhere except Shoprite in the Accra Mall. There, everything costs an annoying Something-something and 99p. They always give you the impotent 1p coin giving a whole new meaning to “Change is constant”.
Fast forward to the not so distant future passed, 2013 and the 'new' cedi was a mess! The price of fuel went up almost every two weeks and with it the price of everything else. Utility tariffs went up but utilities services became irregular. The only thing that stayed constant was salaries! Minimum wage is officially pegged at GhȻ5.24(currently just under $2) but many people earn far less than that.

The cedi depreciates against the Dollar everyday so people stopped quoting prices of anything which mattered (which is everything) in Dollars. Rent, School fees and even in some case medical bills. For a while one couldn't be sure what the official currency of Ghana was anymore. The dollar at is now Ȼ2.41 (Feb 14, 2014)



Can someone please explain to me how in one of the top Cocoa producing countries in the world the average person can't afford to buy chocolate or chocolate products? All the explanations I've heard so far make no sense to me. That's like telling me Bill Gates' kid can't afford a computer because Microsoft only make the Operating System but not the Hardware. Any justification makes no sense. But that is Ghana for you. Nothing makes an iota of sense so when oil was discovered in 'commercial' quantities and we were promised a better life by these politicians, I laughed.

With the economy shamelessly wallowing in filthy, people started looking answers everywhere. That it when things moved from frustrating to ridiculous. Ghanaians are a very religious and superstitious bunch so of cause, every problem should have a spiritual root.

The National Women’s Organizer of the Ruling NDC, Anita Desooso, went on radio and blamed the fall of the cedi on dwarfs, black magic andother malicious evil spirits. *Pause*; Yep, she actually said that. So the abysmal state of the economy wasn't due to the mismanagement of successive governments and most recently by her party the NDC? Seems Legit. Next, famous Nigerian Pastor asked Ghanaians to pray for the cedi because he foresaw a massive economicdown turn for Ghana. Wait, what?! It was going to get worse? Who could have predicted that? It is not as we knew that things were bad. Then Superstar Man-of-God Archibishop Duncan William made the news (once again) when he “commanded the cedi to rise”. Everyday a new Spiritual leader pops up with some expert advice or solution for the demise of the cedi. The cedi's plight is that bad. Most recently, one Pastor actually threatened to drag the ruling party (NDC) to court if the party fails to offer him the position of Spiritual and Special Advisor to the President. I couldn't make this up even if I tried.



We await the Lazarus moment of the cedi, it past the customary 3 days required for resurrection but with all these men of God praying, we remain optimistic.


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Monday, 3 February 2014

Jewel Ahiable and the MV Iceberg 1 Crew

I won't be too surprised if you are a Ghanaian and haven't heard the name Jewel Ahiable or heard his story. Frankly I would never have heard of him if he wasn't my girlfriend's cousin. A quick Google search will have you wondering how and why you haven't heard his story. This is a real life Captain Phillips story.

On March 29, 2010, the Ship MV Iceberg 1 was captured by Somalian Pirates who demanded a $10 million ransom to release the ship and its crew. At the time of the attack, the Panamanian-flagged ship had a crew of 24, made up of 8 Yemenis, 6 Indians, 4 Ghanaians (Jewel Ahiable, Edward Kofi Asare, Francis Koomson Senior and Prince Agbo.), 2 Sudanese, 2 Pakistani and 1 Filipino. The ship owners refused to pay the ransom and this beganthe longest held hijacked ship in modern history.

From March 29, 2010 to December 23, 2012 the crew members were held and tortured. They were permitted to make occasional desperate phone calls to the outside world to describe their plight – a way for pirates to apply pressure in the negotiating process – but for two years and nine months of captivity, nobody answered their pleas for help.

The families of the Ghanaian captives tried to petition the Ghanaian government at the time to help bring the captives home but they were constantly frustrated by the 'Powers that be' and by bureaucracy. According to the government they didn't want any public attention around the incident so that the pirates didn't get too excited.

I've attached a soundcloud audio of Jewel Ahaible and the other crew members narrating their ordeal on Citi FM after their rescued.


audio edited by Esianyo Kumodzi 

At the time of the rescue Ghanaians were still reeling from the death of President Atta Mills and the tension around the December 7th election was still fresh. The news of their rescue would definitely have lifted the mood of the country. I've seen on TV the kind of reaction that followed the rescue of people in perilous situation. The Chilean Miners' rescue and the Hiatian Man found 11 days after the Earthquake being examples.

Since the Government did not contribute anything whatsoever to their rescue and return, the least they could have done was welcome them and created some sort of fan-fair about their rescue but no. They arrived quietly with just Citi FM and their families to meet them. In fact, their rescue was celebrated by Somalians and not Ghanaians. They were hosted by the Somalian President and rode in luxury cars on the streets of Somalia with people cheering them everywhere.


After 3 years of being tortured they received no compensation or the pay due them during the period. The company that owned the ship owed them a few months pay before the ship set off and that hasn't been paid yet. The 4 Ghanaian have tried on many occasion to get the money due them. They've tried to petition the government and relevant bodies but to no avail.



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Saturday, 1 February 2014

Funny Money: the History of Ghana's Money (Pictures)

Pictures of some of Ghana's money over the years

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Tuesday, 21 January 2014

Gh Services Providers: ECG, GCB and the Telcos


ECG (Electricity Company of Ghana)

After 36 hours of no power, I had become reflective and philosophical. I came to the conclusion that ECG wasn't some false idol but a true god that controlled my life. I pleaded with them to forgive me for all the bad things I said about them, the insults and curses. I was truly remorseful. I just wanted them to have pity on me so I could charge my phone and laptop. I didn't want my stew in the fridge to go rancid. The ice in the fridge had thawed and now everything else was melting. But ECG didn't heed my prayer. It didn't matter that I had lots of credit on the prepaid meter. ECG punished me for a further 8 hours.

ECG is a drug dealer that gives us enough of their 'merchandise' to get us hooked and when we were addicted, they would take it away and only give it back after we were forced to pay an unreasonable price for less than average services.

Every year, tariffs go up with the promise of improved services. This has been going on long before I was born.



A friend in Nigeria sent me this picture from an old News Paper Clipping, same story in Ghana


GCB (Ghana Commercial Bank)

Ghana Commercial Bank, sigh...
What isn't wrong with Ghana Commercial Bank? Withdrawing money can be so demeaning it feels as if you are begging not withdrawing your own money. The problem is that GCB is the one bank you can find in every corner of Ghana. When I was doing my National Service in Ashanti Manpong it was the only Bank I could access.


I was recently at one GCB branch and the banking hall and a long winding queue. The air condition wasn't working and there were only 3 tellers at post even though there were about 7 cages. Suddenly one teller just shut her cage and refused to take customers. She didn't go anywhere, she just sat there like an Egyptian sphinx, her eyes glazed with her mind faraway. Some customers pleaded with her to help but she just sat there unresponsive, almost catatonic.

The other two who were working were so slow it was painful to watch. Even worse, the money counting machine kept jamming and they had to clear it and recount. One of them stopped using the machine and would lick her finger and slowly start counting the money herself. Sometimes, she would get confused and start all over again.

I remember when I was in the University (KNUST) it was common occurrence for students who used the ATM not to receive the cash but have their accounts debited. Sometimes the Machine would give less than the money requested but the receipt would show the full amount had been deducted.



GCB was the bank that allowed the lowest minimum balance and for some students, was the only bank back home so we endured these frustrations. Somewhere along the line, students changed the GCB motto from, “We Serve You Better” to “We Swerve You Better”.


TELCOS:

It seems like all the telcos went to a meeting and unanimously decided to frustrate customers. Poor service coupled with infuriating spam SMS is enough to drive anyone crazy. It's amazing how these telcos can send you an SMS telling to send 123 to 456 to register for a raffle but can't send an SMS to inform users of a problem that is going to affect all users nation wide. They won't spend money improving services but will spend millions of cedis to bring some washed out American singer to come perform for 30 minutes. Everyday telcos are giving away cars and cash at one beauty pageant or the other. Their help lines, offer no help at all. The helpers only apologize and ask if you have restarted your phone. I do admit the ladies really have nice voices.

Recently Citi FM started a twitter hashtag #DearGhTelcos where users could vent some pent up anger and frustration. They also called the PR Managers of the various telcos to explain their poor service. The MTN PR Officer blamed China Phones and the Airtel PR Manager Donald Gwira said if users didn't like their services they could unsubscribe and move to another service providers




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Monday, 13 January 2014

African Nations In High School ( #AfricanNationsInHighSchool )

On Sunday January 12, 2014, @SiyandaWrites on twitter started the #AfricanNationsInHighSchool which quickly caught on. Africans everywhere (including yours truly) joined in with some witty tweets. Here is a collection of some of them.




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Saturday, 14 December 2013

Me, at a typical Ghanaian Function

The program was supposed to start at 09:00 but the time was changed to 11:00 the day before and people had to hurriedly call invited guests to change arrangements. The place wasn't too far from where I lived so I wasn't too bothered. I left my room at 10:00 knowing I should be there in 45 minutes max. The driver started moving in an unfamiliar direction and when I asked about it, he said it was a short cut. The journey that was supposed to be 45 minutes ended up being an hour and 20 minutes. Everyone had decided to take the short cut that day!
It was my sister's induction into the Ghana Medical Association and I was peeved that I was going to be late. These were highly educated people and I knew they would be time conscious. I entered the auditorium at 11:25 and the program hadn't began. I also noticed that more seats were being brought in. Each inductee was supposed to have only two guest but some of them came with entourages. A very typical Ghanaian trait. The security at the gate couldn't drive them away so more chairs had to be brought.

When the program started, one of the executives took the stage and, “I'm sorry for the delay it was...” and the audience went, “...due to circumstances beyond our control”, and started laughing. It was all too familiar. All Ghanaian programs seem to begin with this excuse.

There was a choir there and the MC asked them to sing. The music was really good but it was obvious they were being used as a time wasting strategy after their fifth song. By now the audience was getting impatient. It was 12:10 and what they had come to see hadn't started yet. It turned out they were waiting for the members of the council to arrive and finally they did, at 12:20.

The program started and there was this man in front of me who just refused to sit down. He was carrying his iPad over his head like he was at a political demonstration. I tried so many times to tell him he was blocking my view but he didn't seem to care. I shifted slightly to my left and so did he, to my right and he did same. I couldn't help but feel he was doing it on purpose. He also came with a lady and two kids. All this while the lady was struggling to keep the kids calm. Between the man and his family, I managed to miss most of the event.

He finally sat down after the oath and started playing the video. He couldn't wait to do this at home? The video was making noise and everyone was turning round looking for who could be so uncouth. The irony is, he kept scolding his kids to keep quiet even though the video was making more noise than they were.

To add a traditional Ghanaian feel to the induction, each inductees name was to be played on talking drums as they were mentioned. It was obvious the drummer hadn't practiced for this. The MC prolonged the reading unnecessarily by asking the drummer to beat the drums again when the sound didn't sound like the name. Sometimes he would get it right after the third try and there were 68 names! I was wondering if this was necessary. More often than not, the drummer got it wrong and the MC asked him to play again. Thankfully, we managed to reach the end of the list after a few 1000 years.

Then the MC asked if anyone in audience had a word of advice for the newly inducted Doctors and one parent stood up and went to stage. It was supposed to be a short speech but the man got stuck on stage and kept going on and on and on! I noticed one lady among the newly inducted Doctors hiding her face. I suspected that must be her Dad. The audience started clapping to encourage him to end his speech but he either didn't hear them or thought they were enjoying his speech. Either way he went on till the MC got fed up and came for the mic.

Program over. A lady came to give the votes of thanks. If you have ever been to a Ghanaian program you know the general format.

Parents were hugging their children who were now full doctors, pictures and videos were being taken everywhere, the usual. Then I noticed one man who seems to be jumping into everyone's picture. He would see a video being taken and would silently walk in the path of the camera. I had no idea who he was but anytime he tried to photobomb the pictures I was taking I would pause and wait for him to pass. I wasn't going to allow some creep in my Sister's pictures.

The refreshment was outside the hall and guests were supposed to wait for the inducted to take their share first but no one was obeying the rules. Refreshment was just some pastries and a bottled drink. People would finish theirs and go for more so many times obviously trying to get full on small chops and pastries.

I didn't come with my own car so I had to scurry home. The journey home is and the hustle of the Ghanaian public transport system is a story for another day.

PS: Congratulations lil' Sis, or do I have to call you Dr. lil Sis now?


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Tuesday, 10 December 2013

Ghana, One Year after Elections

It's been a little over a year since elections. Remember whoever you voted for? Do you still think you made the right choice? This country has lots of issues and I doubt any of the candidates could fix it but at least, if we had voted for Hassan Ayariga, we would probably be laughing so much our woes would be a bit tolerable.


Or we could have voted for the CPP, at least we would have gotten a chicken each. I was really curious how this was going to work but I guess I will never find out.

Productivity in the first six months was reduced drastically thanks to unreliable power supply and what was in my opinion a very needless election petition. Most people do not agree with me that the petition was needless. The prevailing argument being, the petition strengthen our democracy. No it did not. I never for even a second thought that the court would over turn the election results. Not because I thought the election was fair (I'm not saying it wasn't) but because it was just impractical. In Africa, after every major election, the losing party quickly refutes the results they nag and nag and results are maintained. This petition was a grand waste of time and money.

While this exercise in faultily was going on, the rest of the country was literally burning. Market fires everywhere. Not a week went by I which we didn't hear of one market or the other burning. As usual, someone these fires we politicized. The theory was that, political enemies of the ruling government were the pyromaniacs behind these fires. The president even went to get some 'Special Investigators' from America to come help investigate these fires. Till this date, we've not heard the findings of these investigations.

Anyone with an iota of sense would have realized that these fire were cause by a combination of the sporadic power outages and the power electrical wiring in the said market. Seven months of load shedding and market fires and just when the load shedding was over, the fires ended. Of cause, they would have us believe it was a coincidence.

After seven months of not getting the electricity we were so dearly paying for, long suffering Ghanaians were rewarded with a 78% increase in tariff, 2.5% increase in VAT, numerous increases in fuel prices and a general increase in prices of commodities. Then came the strikes, Doctors, Teachers, Nurses, Lawyers, Pharmacist and even at one time, taxi drivers.

It went up even further, now, fan yoghurt is GhC1.00 😭😭😭😭

Granted, the president couldn't be blamed for all these problems but at a point in time, it didn't look like he was in control of the country. The ministers were on various platform making one ridiculous statement after another. Ministers were contradicting each other and it just felt like the country was a kindergarten class without the teacher.

Then a few weeks ago the president announced that he and his member of parliament were taking a 10% pay cut. This was seen as a good sign by some and others felt it was to score political points the rest of us were just indifferent. Then a few days ago, one minister grandly said workers should follow their example and everyone should take a pay cut. Pause...

It hasn't been all gloom but the rays of sunshine have been far between. What do you remember about the year under review?



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